This was the time when masks were made compulsory in public places. While awaiting my flight home for a relative’s funeral, a couple threw a tantrum upon being informed that using the mask as a chin strap did not count as “wearing” it. Eventually, they gave in when told to wear the masks correctly or find another way to reach their destination.
Finally, I boarded in the last group, reached my row, and discovered that the couple was seated at the aisle and window, with their masks once again below their chins. I was assigned the middle seat, where the couple had placed their bags.
Me: “Hi, sorry, I’m in the middle seat here.”
Woman: *From the aisle seat* “Well, could you perhaps sit somewhere else?”
Me: “I heard this was a fully booked flight, so—”
Woman: *Reaching over to her husband* “My husband and I truly desire to sit together.”
Me: “Oh. Okay, no problem. One of you can take the middle, and I’ll—”
Man: “Hell no! You can ask the stewardess to seat you elsewhere.”
I like to believe that I’m typically a patient and kind individual. However, I was exhausted. These two were neither patient nor kind. They seemed to think they could force me out of my seat, and I’d had more than enough.
Me: “Well, unfortunately, this is a full flight, so you can either move your stuff or I’ll sit on it.”
I pushed past the woman – no simple task – and aimed to sit right on their bags, but the man pulled them away at the last moment. I fastened my seatbelt and put my headphones in, but I didn’t play anything yet.
Woman: “Can you believe her?”
Man: “If she were [Someone whom I assume is their daughter], she’d be over my knee.”
Me: *Removing a headphone* “You could try, but there isn’t much space here.”
[Man] stares at me, and I hear [Woman] gasp.
Me: “Again, if you want to sit together, I’m willing to exchange with you. This isn’t my ideal situation either.” *Pauses* “No? Okay, then.”
[Man] calls the flight attendant.
Attendant: “Yes? Oh, please pull your masks up. Thank you.”
[Woman] positions her mask below her nose.
Woman: “Could she sit elsewhere, please? We were hoping to be together.”
Attendant: “All the way up, ma’am.”
The woman complies grudgingly.
Attendant: “Miss, could you switch with one of them?”
Me: “Sure.” * Looks back and forth* “Who wants to trade? No? Well, if there are any other seats, please let me know and I’ll move. They want the entire row, but they don’t want to shift from their positions.”
Attendant: *Barely suppressing an eye-roll* “I’ll see what I can do.”
The boarding process concludes, and the attendant returns. The couple puts their masks back up just as she arrives at our row.
Attendant: “Hi there. We have a seat in first class if—”
Woman: *Standing* “I’ll take it.”
Attendant: “You said you wanted to stay with the gentleman by the window, so I was actually offering it to her.” *Gestures to me*
Me: “I’ll take it, thank you.”
The woman scarcely left enough space for me to squeeze past her as I moved out. Surprisingly, there were actually TWO unoccupied seats in first class, side by side. Not only did I get a free upgrade, but I also didn’t have to sit with anyone!
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